My first confession here, and yes, I am new to this place. How I found it, and how I ended up here is a long story, which I can begin to explain by saying that I have always been very sexually active. You can't say that I was promiscous, but I always looked at sex as something normal, healthy and generally a thing no one should be ashamed of.

I am 38 now, female, married for almost 15 years, mom, and. a good wife. My husband is a love of my life, I am still very much attracted to him, we have good sex, and, there is not a single reason I should be unhappy. But...

My sex drive was always higher than his. At the start, when we went at each other like rabbits, I was fully satisfied, I gotta admit. But, since many years have passed, our sex is not as frequent as it once was, and that pushed me to self pleasuring, on a frequent schedule. And, long story short, I somehow ended up here, not for the porn, but for the written word, that can be mostly awful, and clearly made up, but it can be very enticing and exciting to see and read about the experiences and turn ons by others.

So, I guess this is where my story actually begins. I have always been flirty and I have been told more than once, that I am charming, as generally a very socially oriented person, but in the past few years, I have been using flirting as a kind of a vent, fully knowing that it won't lead nowhere, but still practicing it, for the fun of it. Combine that with, always growing self awareness, and the fact that I understand that time passing by is not getting me any younger, a compliment here and there makes me feel warm on the inside.

To be clear, I am objectively aware that I am above average looking for my age, but still, we all have our inner doubts, and we all enjoy our doses of serotonin.

So, in July, I went to a short holiday to Greece, with my mother and my offspring (as I understand the other word is forbidden here), as my husband was prevented to go at that time, because of work, and we also planned another little trip in August, when only we will go to the seaside.

First day, I have noticed a guy working at the kitchen bar, looking at me. It was a small hotel beach, in Rhodes, with a restaurant / caffe on the beach, and an open kitchen, looking at the beach. We chose a place right underneath it, at the top of the beach, and I caught him looking. It is not the first time someone gawks at me in a bikini, so, I forgot about it instantly. That same day, when we went to lunch at the same place, when our orders came, I saw that only my salad had eatable flower decoration on it. When I figured that out, I instinctively looked at the direction of the bar, and he was looking back, with a smile, obviously waiting for my reaction, and if I will figure it out.

That is where our game began. I thought nothing of it. He was a semi/handsome man, in his 20s I would say. Tomorrow, we located again at the top of the beach, and I deliberately started teasing him. You know, nothing special, turning the subbed so he can see me, moving my bikini so I can tan my bottoms. Again, flowers in the salad, plus, the waiter brought a rose in a little vase, only to our table.

Same the next day, as I got a little more daring, when the other two were in the water, I got my top off, to catch a few rays, while also checking if he is looking. He was.

The next day, I was deliberately standing in his sight, while oiling myself to prevent sunburns. I did it slowly, and I did it in a cheeky, sensual way. I also made eye contact for a few seconds, while doing it. And it was exciting, I must say. Not the fact that I wanted to do anything with him, but the fact that he was obviously attracted to me, and that he enjoyed this play, more than I did.

On the 4th or 5th day, I decided to drink my cocktail, standing at the bar, and as the caffe bar, and kitchen bar are continuing to one another, I chose the place at the division of these two sections. He was clearly sweating, not just from the heat, as I saw he was battling with himself if he should talk to me. For a moment, I thought that the kitchen staff is forbidden from talking to the guests, but that wasn't the case, he was just nervous. Then, I realised, he is maybe 24 or 25, and I might look scary to him, as I forgot that I am an "older lady" for him, and that made me feel bad, maybe I have over done it.

But, he found the nerve, and started talking. He was asking me, in bad English, these profane questions: where I am from, am I enjoying the holiday etc. I acted uninterested at first, but he didn't give up. The next day, I started flirting, you know, for flirting sake and my dose of serotonin, and that soften him up a bit.

How I felt? I felt wanted, and one day I even got a little horny, and sent my husband an unsolicited topless photo.

So, I guessed that will be it, even as our flirting game continued.

On day 8, I went out at the evening to the city of Rhodes, since the hotel is not far from it, by taxi, and just wandered around. My trip companions weren't up for it, so I was alone. Just walking, looking at the shop windows etc. And guess, what, around 9p.m., when I was gawking at some silly local made sandals, I heard a silent "hello".

It was him, with a grocery bag, smiling at me. My heart started beating faster, I wasn't expecting him out of the hotel. He politely asked me for a coffee, and I agreed.

What followed was very hard for me. The poor guy outright admitted his feelings for me, like a high school kid, started talking how he works those seasonal jobs during the summer, that he is from continental Greece, etc, etc... That is when I asked him about his age. 21. I felt like the crappiest person in the world. I found an excuse why I have to rush back, mumbled about seeing him tomorrow, and fled.

I thought about how I must've done harm to this young man, and that this time I went overboard, by teasing him into thinking that something could have happened. I really felt bad. Tomorrow, I chose the sunbeds lower, by the sea, so I could avoid him. When I went for a shower, since the showers are at the top of the beach, I caught him looking at me. His face... He was obviously aware that the charade is over.

On our last day, I was laying at the beach, with these thoughts racing through my mind. And at one point, it was after lunch, I just got up, and started walking towards the bar, not knowing what I actually want to say. To apologise?

As I approached, his smile was there. And I just blurred out "I wanna say bye, I am leaving tomorrow"

He was still smiling, and said something like "I liked having you around, looking and talking to you"

And that is where I snapped. "you have a place where I can give you a goodbye kiss"

Regreted saying that, the moment I said it. It looked like he was about to choke on the words not able to come out of his mouth "bed room, around corner"

As I walked to the "bed room", I had the urge to run away, but I thought, you made your bed, so now...

As I got around the corner, I realised that it was a room with spare sunbeds, not a bedroom. He was there, in his apron, breathing heavily. When I got in, and closed the door, we were in a complete dark for a few seconds, before he reached for the light. In those few seconds, a year passed in my mind.

I have never cheated on my husband. Never. My, before mentioned sexual appetite has only been fed by myself, in moments between encounters with my husband. I thought I would never cheat on him, since he really didn't deserve it, but on the other hand, I just wanted to give something to this young man, who I used maliciously, for my own fun, not fully understanding the scale of his feelings. I wanted to have sex with him, at that moment, I did, but from the bottom of my heart, I felt ashamed for wanting to cheat. So when that light came up, I got on my knees, and gave him a blowjob.

He was confused, and obviously very horny. I think he wasn't really experienced, since he was just standing there, stiff, while not touching me at all, except for a few light, gentle touches of my breasts, over the swimsuit. He didn't last long, maybe a few minutes, and he really wanted me, judging by the amount of cum, that I wasn't able to swallow by a single gulp.

When I got up, trying to hide the tremor in my legs, I acted all normal, and kissed him on the cheek. And just went out.

I can't remember the last time I was that wet.

Now, two months later, I am still haunted by this. On one hand, I feel terrible for cheating on my husband, and on the other, I can't stop thinking about that whole event. And if you are asking, no, there is no way this or anything similar will happen in the future. I am out of the flirting game, for good.

hi im looking for a video ive seen before but cant seem to find now but see a gif of it often when surfing, i believe it was a threesome(possibly gangbang, 1 girl multiple guys). during a break in the sex there is some fingering and the girl tries to get up in the middle of having full body tremors from an orgasm and her eyes roll back. pic related sorry so small only thing i could find

This will be a long confession, so if you do not have the time, just skip it.

I am 41, divorced, and I am currently in the sexual relationship of my dreams... or nightmares, I cant decide.

I married young, straight out of high school. He was my colleague, and my first real bf. I didnt have almost any sexual experiences in hs, since I was ugly, I had a big acne vulgaris problem, and I was desperate. Desperate to that extent that, my only "sexual" experience was, when at this party, senior year (we were both 18 at the time), this guy flat out told me he wants his dick sucked tonight, and I did it. That was the extent of male attention I got.

So, my husband was the first man who gave me any attention. My acne problem has started to withdraw a bit, after many, many sessions of therapy, and I was over the moon. He was my man, my perfect man, a man who loves me, who came to my aid, a man who I will share my life with. Sadly, after a few years of trying, we found out I am unable to get pregnant. He told me that it doesnt matter, that he loves me, but became distant over time, and eventually, started to hate me, so we divorced.

I was 24 when I got left alone, again. I was on a verge of self distruction - my life had no meaning. Those were some dark times, I thought about leaving everything and becoming a nun, or even to do the worst - harm myself.

Luckily, I got some therapy, and things started picking up, one thing at the time. I learned how to love myself, the way I am, and started doing little things, to make my life better. I became a fitness freak, dedicating my body to that goal, started eating healthy, and that really changed my own perception of myself. I started noticing male looks at the gym, and that pleased me. Over time, I have come to realize, that my body was "hot" even before I started my transformation. New found self esteem came rushing through my body.

Life was good, except, I was still alone. If I hadnt started masturbating very young, I would have thought that I was some kind of a frigid witch, since, my sex life with my ex husband, didnt really bring anything good in that department. Resolved to work on myself, I have totally abandoned the idea of a new love, or even a pure sexual relationship - this site is just one of few places I have visited over the years, while searching for a thrill, a fantasy, but being just too scared to pursue anything real, in life.

Now, when I come to think of it, there wasnt even a chance for me to meet someone, my life was work, gym, and home. I detected some flirts along the way, but I guess I was just too closed (or gave off that impression), that nothing came of it.

Until I met him. It was a year ago. He is ten years younger, single, good looking, and to be honest, when he started flirting, I was thinking something like "is this guy making fun of me". But he wasnt, he was, and still is very much into me.

As I have written here before, I was closed to the idea of meeting someone, but he was very charming, and adamant, to make this work.

He took me on my very first date, after more than 15 years. We had sex that night, and, oh my loving god, it was amazing!!!

We were like rabbits, doing it all day, every day. I wanted to make sure to catch up on everything I have missed in the previous life, so my world started revolving around sex. My orgasms were real, hard, tremor hard, I wanted to do everything for him.

And he is such a passionate lover, always finds a way for me to get even further, to cum harder, to enjoy every inch of his body, and mine too.

Now we are finally getting to the bottom of this story.

His favorite position is, when I am on top, he told me, since, it is the easiest one for me to get off. He started playing with my anus, when I am on top, and close to cumming. That made me shake like a rabbit.

Then, he started putting his finger in, positioning it so that, when I go down on his cock, I go down on his finger (one at start, later two fingers), making me choose the pace, and depth. It was getting so intense, that I felt that was the sexiest thing ever, made me want him to get in there.

But he wasnt, he would just do it, and one time, he pulled his fingers out, spread my cheeks wide, so I could feel I was gaping back there, and he whispered (you need a cock in there). I was still riding him, close, really close to cumming, so I just yelled for him to put it in, but he pulled me close to him, and grunted "you need a cock in your ass while I make love to you"... That was the hardest orgasm I ever had. I swear to god, I think I even passed out for a second there.

So, this game of ours, evolved, from but plugs, to smaller dildos, to eventually, big ones. This combo was, and still is, the best thing I ever did, and I am quite sure that it is the hottest thing one can do in sex. Eventually, in one of these steamy sessions, through the lust, he told me that "I need a real deal".

After we both cooled off, I wanted to talk about, but I wasnt sure, if he was serious. He was. He has a friend (I know him), who is pretty much his confidence, and they even had some threesome experience together in college...

Now, me, from five, ten, fifteen years ago, this prude unsure woman, would never agree to this, but now... I said yes in an instant.

First time was a disaster. All three of us were feeling weird, he came from a blow job, and couldnt get it up afterwards.

Second time we decided to get a few drinks to loosen up, and it worked, but again, as soon as he got into me, he came, my bf came, and I was the only one that didnt.

But, the third time it worked. And the forth, and fifth...

Now, the three of us are having sex once a week (at one period of time, we did it five times in one week), and it is amazing.

Now comes the tricky part - I am quite sure that this arrangement will have to end at one point. I saw the cracks in my bf. I have entered all of this, as his idea, with an open mind. So, last month, when they came to my home, and I got my period while showering, he was mad. Not, because I told him that, but because I offered to give them a bj. I did it, but I could see he was feeling off about it. Tried talking to him, he brushed it off, but I see it is not that way. Since I felt jealousy, I proposed to him for us to end it, he said no, again, he is fine.

Only, he is not, and I feel that I will lose him.

So, I am at this cross road, should I continue this, while aware what is going on, or should I be determined to end this threesome thing, trying to save our relationship, and most importantly, will I save it, or is it beyond repair?

These questions in the end are more rhetorical, I just needed to get this off my chest. In the end, decision is on me.

Who is this man? please someone find something on him. we call him tremor man at work

I got back from my ex’s place a while ago (and yes, “we did”, just to relive old times and see if we could beat old records), and we were talking about the good times, and the *very* good times. One time really stood out to us, and I thought I’d share. I had to go to her place anyway to place to pick something up from her roommates, but I decided to check in with her. I’m used to just walking into her room anyway. She sometimes had her music on too loud to hear anybody at her door anyway, and usually her “if door’s locked, fuck off” rule didn’t apply to me anyway. If she had her music on too loud to hear someone knocking on her door, and I was there, I could usually just text her to see if she’s doing something, and she’d let me in.

That night was different. Rather than text, I went another route entirely. By then, we had already broken up, but we were still friends. We met online but broke up before we ever got to the point where we could meet, so that was actually the first time we fucked. That was the first opportunity I had to really get her alone, to get her vulnerable, and how vulnerable was she? She had her room door locked since she still lived with a couple of others. She had her music blasting and her eyes closed, and she was rubbing the ever-loving fuck out of her pussy.

I managed to sneak into her room without her noticing with a key that she’d sent me a few months earlier, when we were still dating, and I locked the door again behind me. I didn’t want anyone to ruin what I was thinking for either of us.

Oh god, she looked amazing. My tall blonde beauty, so tone and firm, spread out on her bed, fingers glistening in her sweet juices. The towel beneath her looked like it was soaked when I crawled up between her legs. Really, half of her bed ended up drenched in sweat by the end, but the sheets weren’t nearly as bad as the towel. She later told me she’d been keeping herself on the edge for 20-30 minutes (she’d lost track in the confusion) and was just about to finish when I’d moved up. From like an inch away, I could already feel heat on my lips, and she was burning hot; I could already taste the sweetness of her juices on my tongue from an inch away, my dick was already rock hard, and I could not resist any longer.

I timed it just right (or at least, I tried to), so that in one motion, I could both extend my tongue to her clit and bury two fingers tightly bound together in a twisting motion into her sopping wet hole.

When I did, I felt my head being locked into a vice between her legs, her pussy felt like it was trying to break and devour my fingers. Then we locked eyes, oh those lovely blue eyes of hers, how they always reminded me of the blue skies on a sunny day. I gave her a smile as best as I could with my tongue half out and head being slightly crushed, and I swear, her pussy was getting tighter and wetter by the second while her legs went almost completely limp. She’d lost all control once she panicked, and it was like a levee broke free, she came so hard and squirted so much and so hard that even 5 years later, I can still remember it so clearly, it felt like someone was spraying me in the mouth with a really strong garden hose. I almost had to stop because I had trouble breathing, but I didn’t want to disappoint her for our first time together, so I kept going.

I could feel every muscle in her body contract simultaneously, and it seemed to hit in waves of 3-4 times, set apart by about 2 seconds where she’d relax between them. I think if she didn’t live on the basement floor, she might have alarmed the neighbors with her moans and initial scream. After the first scream, her breathing became very, very heavy, and it honestly sounded like she couldn’t help but gasp for breath every few seconds. One of her housemates definitely heard her, and she started pounding on the door asking her if everything was alright. It was all she could do to moan “uh huh”. Her friend asked her to do that again so she could be sure she was alright. I’m thinking “Just fuck off already, please. I know she’s your friend, but she’s clearly got something going on in here”.

She eventually accepted the second “uh huh” and said ‘have fun’. Oh, we were, but… both my hands busy, left hand massaging her tits and right hand giving her pussy the twister, and that left me thinking “I probably should have taken my cock out before I started this” as it started trying to painfully escape my pants. She locked fingers with my hand on her boob at some point, and I knew she was responding too well to my fingers in her pussy to pull them away, so I suffered with it for a minute (that felt like a fucking eternity). I could feel her muscles start to relax a bit, and her breathing got a bit more regular, but I didn’t really want to wait anymore for her to fully recover. I stopped massaging her boobs long enough to pull my dick out, and it felt so fucking good to finally not be straining against my pants.

Once I’d freed the beast, it only took me a second to hop up on the bed and replace my fingers with my rock-hard dick, her right leg over my right shoulder. I kept looking at her eyes, and though she looked like she was about to panic again when she saw me line it up, I waited until I saw a slight nod (it may have just been a tremor in the bed for all I knew, and I would have taken it as a sign that she was into it. I just couldn’t wait any longer). She later told me that for the first 30 seconds of our “second act”, she would have considered it rape under any other circumstances since she really couldn’t have said ‘no’ even if she’d wanted to, but that if I ever wanted to ‘rape’ her again under those circumstances to just take anything but a scream or a kick to the face as a sign of consent.

Her face though, after the initial stroke, her eyes rolled back underneath her eyelids, and she started tightening up again, as if her pussy was just waiting for my dick to start milking it. I could hear her moans and groans slowly becoming gasps for breath a little with every stroke. I’d occasionally slow down every so often so we could catch our breaths. She had to get used to this arrangement, because I wasn’t going to be finished for another 5 minutes. I could have held for longer, but I began to feel too much like I was just using her as a fuck toy. I did still, and do still love her. I couldn’t just ‘fuck’ her like that.

I wanted her to still look back on that night as a good thing, so as I got closer, the pace sorta changed from just animalistic and raw sex to an almost sensual ‘making love’ pace. We were still so into it that it didn’t click that I’d been cumming inside of her until we’d done it again a few more times. Even then, we didn’t have any condoms, but we felt the damage had been done, so we just kept going.

We’re still friends to this day. Some would say we’ve been in an open relationship ever since we first started dating since we just hook up whenever we’re bored, horny, or just need some company.

This isn't the usual post you might expect to see here at Motherless. Many of you have asked about what it's like living with all the medical issues I have. I posted this on fb as a response to some misguided remarks I heard that reminded me of Mr. Ryan's comment on Twitter. I don't know if it will help anyone understand but I can't keep hiding just because I don't want to bee seen as weak. How can I expect anyone to understand what me and some of your friends and loved ones may go through, if I don't speak out. Knowledge is power and through knowledge comes understanding ...

Not sure how many of you have heard of Dave Ryan of 101.3 KDWB, but back in 2009 he has posted on his twitter account: "Also, those who claim they have fibromylagia. People who should be shot: those who walk sloooooowly off the plane 7 minutes behind the last person in front of them." While he did post an apology about it, the damage had still been done.

Why bring it up after all this time? I wanted to show an example of the ignorance and unkindness people that live with chronic illness deal with on an everyday basis, even from doctors and the people who love us. Fibromyalgia, Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and many others, are confirmed medical conditions. It's not in our head. We are not lazy or being selfish by holding you up when you are in line.

We. Are. In. Pain. Every day. Every minute. Pain. With it can come nausea, muscle weakness, tremors, neuropathy, migraines and a list longer than I have the strength to type. The simplest tasks to us are like a full days work for you. My own family that lives with me is only just now starting to truly understand and they've lived it with me for 20+ years. So how can I possibly hope to be able to help you understand what it's like to live with this every day, when you have no comprehension of how bad it can get.

Imagine the worst case of flu you've ever had, the nausea, the fevers, the body aches. Now think of your worst cold, the stuffed nose, the painful sinuses, the sore throat. What about the worst headache you've ever had, remember that? Imagine the coldest you've ever been, so cold you can't feel your hands anymore and the pain as the blood started coming back into them. How about the times your arm or leg has fallen asleep and the painful stinging that comes as it wakes back up. Ever had a pulled muscle, back ache, torn ligament? Fun wasn't it? And don't forget that bad toothache you had or worse yet, a root canal. Doesn't that sound like a nice way to spend a day?

Now, take ALL of those and add them together. Then multiply that by a factor of 5. That is what it can be like. And that's not even a bad day or even most of the 63 symptoms that just Fibromyalgia can present. It takes someone with fibromyalgia 5 times MORE energy to do most things than it does someone else. We look fine many days, but we are not. And we live with it every single day.

The past two days are a good example. Yesterday I hurt but nothing unusual about that, at least I was still able to move around the house enough to spend a bit of time with my family and had enough strength to handle a knife on my own and make my own dinner. Was nice being able to open a jar without help. To be able to lift a plate by myself and not ask for help. Being able to sit in the recliner and pull the lever up by myself.

Today ... well today is different. I couldn't make dinner even if I wanted to. But nausea and weakness have decided to visit and it's all I could do just to get an Ensure shake down at lunch. Muscle weakness is bad so I had to ask for help. My son made dinner for me while I shuffled slowly to the living room to sit down before the tremors got so bad I fall.

Then it was time to tackle dinner, a toasted cheese sandwich, something easy to eat and fairly easy on the stomach. Ever tried to force yourself to eat when you feel like puking? Fun, ain't it? I got through that and am now exhausted. How can you relate, when something so simple as eating can wipe you out for the rest of the day? Writing this post has taken me an hour and a half, just because I'm having to fight my own body to get my hands to function.

This is the kind of stuff we hide from you. Not because we don't care, but because it takes too much energy, energy we need just to survive, to try to correct your well intentioned but misquided ignorance. When you dismiss our disease, you dismiss us. More than relief from the pain and all the other things we deal with, what we want most is understanding and acceptance.

There is no cure. I will have this for the rest of my life. If I have to live this way, at the very least, I'd like people to see past the disease and see me.

Be patient with us, we are giving everything we can and many times more, just to try to attempt to be part of the world we once lived in, so carefree and oblivious to just how fucking lucky we were.

To the Dave Ryans in the world, do your research before you make assumptions about something you know nothing about. I pray you never have to live life like this.

#a hope for understanding

Thank you for listening and may you be blessed with a long, healthy and happy life :)

On a side note: I had to add this vid. Despite being diagnosed over 2 years ago, I hadn't met anyone who dealt with the issues I am. Then I found this video ... and bawled for an hour. Why? Because I know now I'm not alone. I'm not the only one who fights each day just to survive to see another. Yet another thing we don't talk about with you. How isolating these diseases are. And yes, I'm sorry to say this, but the ignorant comments that people make just make us feel that much more alone.

Thanks again for listening. Blessings upon you and yours.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=buqt16KSucM