Just writing this out for myself and anyone in a similar position.
I'm in a relationship with a girl and have been for about 8 years, so I consider myself straight. When watching porn (yes, we have sex... I just like watching it and jacking off - it's fun) I've never minded watching a threesome with one girl and two guys. The furthest I'll go is watching a double blowjob, but as soon as I see a guys face, it ruins it for me.
I love watching blowjob videos and cumming in mouths, but a big turn on for me is kissing the girl once she's gone down on me. I've thought about it and I had a bit of time were I fantasised about doing that mid threesome with my gf after she'd been down on the other guy. Yet, I feel like I wouldn't want to do that, it's just a porn watching thing. Especially as most porn I've liked doing that, have been POVs.
But then it goes a little further. Even though I don't like men, their faces or their bodies, there's something about a cock that turns me on. I get turned on tasting my own old cum, but I wouldn't/can't taste my cum when I finish in my gfs mouth (even though she wants to). I only have this feeling when I'm hard.
However, I may have found the answer to my sexual fantasies. I've recently been obsessed with trans girls that are old-op, both with a cock and with boobs. They're so attractive to me and I can't stop imagining what it'd be like to meet someone like that and invite them for a threesome with my gf.
Thinking about it, I would be attracted to both her and my gf so I'd be hard. That means, I'd kiss both of them, I'd kiss my gf after she's been sucking both our dicks, I'd get off watching those two kiss. It's actually turning me on right now. See, so now I'm thinking I would help my gf suck her off, before I take over completely. After getting her cock wet and sloppy I think I would want her to slide it in to me, while I eat out my gf and they both kiss. If I were to do anything more, I'd need to be the one to cum last, or at least at the same time.
Yeaaah yeah, I know, it might not play out like that, but it's what turns me on.
Anyway, I know there's a "market" for this stuff as it's a huge genre in porn, but I still feel like I need to clear up my feelings to myself. Anyone else similar?
